FATSTORM AHH

Fatstorm? I'm sorry, I meant thunderstorm. That's what the weather is like right now. It was such a perfect day this morning...Anyway, if you wanted to know, I'm just a tad frightened of thunder. I know that it isn't rational, because its just the sound lightning makes - and that's what I should be afraid of, if I were to choose between the two. But no, I think lightning is pretty, and the sound just scares me. Woo for being irrational!

Anyway, I cannot stress how much staying at home and "studying" is making me fat. I'm sitting here, and a few hours later I look to the side and there's empty wrappers where chocolate and other snacks used to be. I have this thing where I eat non-stop. I need to keep my mouth moving and tasting yummy food! I can't help myself. It didn't matter so much when I was playing volleyball three times a week, but it's been a couple of weeks since I've gone to training because of the need to study, and now it is so noticeable that I've gotten chubbier. Gawd. And the thing is, no matter how much I tell myself that I need to stop snacking, I still find myself grabbing a handful of snacks before heading to my room. Heck, I've got some chocolates and haw flakes next to me on the table right now.

SO. I have decided. I will go to the gym in the huge 3.5 month break I have, and work off the excess fat, and maybe even keep fit, instead of letting myself go like last year. And when I say letting myself go, I don't mean pigging out everyday and returning to uni looking like a whale, but I just lost my fitness. It killed me when we got a new volleyball coach, whose first 10 trainings or so all we did was fitness. I hope I'll get fitter in the holidays and I won't have to go through as much pain when we do those fitness sessions again next year.

Hmm, I think I should also stop saying "omg, i'm so fat now" to my friends, because all they reply with is "No you're not!", and tell me that I'm skinny. I know that's probably what I wanted to hear, subconsciously or something, but I should stop. Because them reassuring that I'm skinny will reassure me that I can keep eating and everything will be okay. And if I get used to this habit of continuously eating, I think in the future I will definitely definitely get obese. So yeh.

I need to stop (probably gradually, not straight away, or I'll suffer from continuous food withdrawals) - better make that reduce - my eating habits, so that I won't end up a fatso in the future.

And OMG, I should be studying but I am so obsessed with Glee right now. I know I know, I'm behind the times and whatnot but I DON'T CARE. I loves it. =3

glee- i mean, STUDY time!

x

*Update*
Rents say its a waste of money to go to the gym. So instead, I will *cringe* jog every day? Maybe go bike riding. Play a bit of soccer. Etc etc. No gym tho.